


dance alone to the beat of your heart

by eunwoozi



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, First Crush, M/M, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-24 10:15:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17702456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eunwoozi/pseuds/eunwoozi
Summary: Junhui has a crush on Jihoon. He makes a plan to confess.





	dance alone to the beat of your heart

**Author's Note:**

> me this morning at 6:43am, eating a bagel: junhoon valentine's day au 
> 
> I typed this entire thing out in like three hours so pls forgive me for any mistakes. 
> 
> fic title is from fob's the phoenix

“I’m going to die.”

“You’re not going to die.”

“He’s going to say no, killing me instantly.” Junhui said resolutely. 

“He’s not going to say no,” Wonwoo said without looking up. 

“How do you know that?” Junhui groaned. 

“Because he likes you,” Wonwoo said without missing a beat, tapping his keyboard furiously and taking out another monster on his screen.

“What?!” Junhui screeched, jolting Wonwoo out of his seat and causing ‘GAME OVER’ to flash across his screen. “Did he tell you that? Wonwoo I swear to—“ 

“Okay no he didn’t, but,” Wonwoo raised his hands up defensively. Junhui slumped back in Wonwoo’s bed and sighed loudly.

Wonwoo took off his headphones entirely and swiveled around in his chair. “I’ve known Jihoon since 2nd grade. That’s ten years. I think I can tell when he likes someone.” Junhui just reclined fully onto Wonwoo’s bed and pulled a pillow over his head. 

“Are you sure?” He asked meekly, his words muffled by the pillow. 

“I’m like, ninety percent sure.” Wonwoo said, patting Junhui’s knees. 

Junhui pulled the pillow back and looked at Wonwoo with wide eyes. “What’s the other ten percent?” He cried out. 

Wonwoo shrugged, “Maybe he just thinks you’re really funny.”

Junhui hugged the pillow. “But I am really funny,” Junhui wailed. 

Wonwoo just rolled his eyes, “He likes you. I’m…pretty sure.” 

“But how can you know?” Junhui groaned.

Wonwoo shrugged again, “He…acts differently around you. I can’t explain it.” 

“But how?” Junhui cried.

Wonwoo sighed loudly and kicked his legs up onto the bed. “I don’t know! I can just tell, okay?” 

Junhui jut out his lower lip in a pout and glowered at him. 

Wonwoo wiggled his feet towards him. “How’s your love letter going?” He gestured at the card lying next to him. Junhui just wordlessly slid the card to him. 

Wonwoo grabbed the card. It had two stick figures, one of which was holding a glittery heart balloon. He opened the card, which was blank inside except for a few words. 

“‘Jihoon, I like you. Will you be my valentine?’” Wonwoo read aloud. 

Junhui let out a muffled noise from underneath the pillow. 

“That’s all you’ve got?” Junhui didn’t respond. 

“You’ve been in love with Jihoon for what, three years? And all you have is ‘I like you please be my valentine?’” Wonwoo asked, sounding horrified. 

Junhui threw the pillow aside and sat up and snatched his card back. 

“Shut up. I am not ‘in love with him,’” Junhui motioned loose quotations mark around the phrase. He could feel his cheeks steadily warming.

Wonwoo just raised his eyebrows and gave him a look, prompting Junhui to throw a pillow at him. Wonwoo smoothly caught it in his hands. 

Junhui was not in love with Jihoon. He had a teeny tiny little crush on him. For the past three years. Alright, so maybe it was a little bigger than a teeny tiny little crush. But he was not ‘in love with him’. Love was a big word, too much weight on its shoulders. Junhui just liked him a normal amount. “What do you think I should write?” 

Wonwoo grabbed the card again and flipped it back and forth in his hands. “You could write why you like him?” He pondered.

Junhui made a face. “That’s weird. It’s not an essay.” 

Wonwoo just threw the card back on the bed again. “Then what do you suggest?” 

“I don’t know!” Junhui wailed again, looking at the card. He sighed. “Maybe I should make it seem casual. Like ‘Hey! Be my valentine. But like as friends.’ So he won’t reject me?” 

Wonwoo pulled a face. “First of all, that makes no sense.” He pointed at Junhui. “Second of all, you can’t…casually date Jihoon. Not when you’ve been in love with him for three years.” 

Junhui just slumped over resignedly, burying his face into the mattress. “I’m not in love with him.” He said, his voiced muffled by the bed. 

Wonwoo just patted his back and rolled his chair back to his desk, pulling his headphones over his ears and starting another game. Junhui turned his head to the side to face Wonwoo.

“I’m not in love with him.” Junhui shouted again, trying to convince himself more than anyone. 

**  
Junhui was having an existential crisis in the floral section of Vons’. Why were there so many flowers? Who knew there were this many plants in the world? How could he choose which ones to buy? Why did flowers have a language? What if he bought flowers that accidentally said ‘You will die soon’ and Jihoon gets hurt and never talks to him again? Jihoon probably didn’t know any flower language but he’d always been better at biology than Junhui was. Or was this English? Jihoon was better than him in that too. Jihoon was just better than him at everything. Including being cute. He was practically perfect. Junhui groaned out loud, catching the attention of one of the workers. 

“Do you need help?” A young worker asked in concern. He couldn’t have been much older than him. His name tag said Jeonghan. 

“Kind of. Do any of these bouquets…mean anything?” Junhui turned to him. 

Jeonghan gave him a quizzical look. “What do you mean?” 

Junhui took a deep breath, “You know how roses mean love?...What do these flowers mean?” He gestured vaguely at the bouquets in front of him. 

Jeonghan just looked between the buckets of bouquets and him. “I don’t know. I just stock products. I think it would be fine picking the one that you like the best?” He gave him a weak smile. 

Junhui murmured a thanks and turned to frown at the flowers. They were practically mocking him, glowing in all their bright beauty. 

“Is this for someone special?” Jeonghan asked. 

Junhui nodded and scratched his head sheepishly. “I wanted to tell this guy that I like him.” 

Jeonghan broke out into a smile. “You should pick a bouquet that reminds you of him.” 

Junhui turned to him with wide eyes. “You’re right. Thank you!” Junhui said enthusiastically. 

“No problem.” Jeonghan beamed. “I hope everything goes well. Come back and let me know”

Junhui nodded profusely and waved as Jeonghan left. 

He picked up one of the bouquets. It had multiple stems of small white flowers, and was dotted with soft pink roses. The centerpiece of the bouquet were three bright sunflowers. The sunflowers reminded him of Jihoon’s old blonde hair. He had showed up to school after spring break last year with his hair a bright golden yellow, and Junhui thought his heart was going to leap out of his chest to chase the sun. He couldn’t hear anything but blood pounding in his ears for the rest of the day. He complimented him and Jihoon thanked him with a warm smile, dimples and all, his ears turning cherry red. Junhui felt his soul depart his body. Wonwoo and Soonyoung were subjected to Junhui’s excessive gushing and babbling until he dyed it back later that year. 

Junhui held the bouquet up and held it at arm’s length. He could see the golden blonde boy of the summer again, dimples in his cheeks, smile in his eyes. 

**

Junhui woke up to the incessant sound of his ringtone. He squinted at the clock on his desk. 1:22AM. He looked at his phone, Soonyoung’s unmistakable face flashing across the screen. 

“Hello?” Junhui said groggily. 

“Open your door,” was all he said. 

“What?” Junhui turned confusedly to his bedroom door. 

“We’re outside your house. Let us in.” Soonyoung said urgently. 

“Why are you outside my house? Who’s we?” Junhui groaned and got out of bed. 

“It’s cold! Let us in!” Wonwoo yelled into the phone. 

“I’m coming!” Junhui yelled back and headed to the front door. It was 1AM, on a Wednesday. They all had school tomorrow. He had to get up in 5 hours. He couldn’t fathom why this couldn’t wait until the morning.

He opened the door to Soonyoung and Wonwoo, looking bright and enthusiastic and clutching Target bags in their hands. They pushed Junhui aside and let themselves in, shivering. 

“Why are you here?” Junhui asked again. Soonyoung and Wonwoo grinned at each other. 

“Do you want to show him?” Wonwoo asked. Soonyoung nodded enthusiastically. He pulled the bag from Wonwoo’s hand and reached in to pull out a plush toy. It was white and gray, but it didn’t look like a teddy bear, or any animal that he knew. 

“Tada!” Soonyoung shouted excitedly. 

Junhui tilted his head curiously. “What is that?” 

“It’s a stingray!” Soonyoung positioned the flippers outwards and showed him the smile on the underside of the plush. 

He turned to them with furrowed brows, “You drove all the way over here and woke me up to show me a toy?” 

Wonwoo rolled his eyes, “It’s for you, dumbass.”

Soonyoung placed the stingray gingerly in Junhui’s hands. 

“For me?” Junhui held up the plush toy. It was pretty cute, but he still couldn’t see the urgency in waking him up. 

“Well, for you to give to Jihoon.” Soonyoung clarified. Junhui just gave him a blank look, “for Valentine’s tomorrow?” Suddenly, everything clicked. 

They had gone to an aquarium for a class trip last year, and Junhui pointed out how the stingrays’ faces reminded him of Jihoon. They both had similar dimples on their cheeks, and their mouths were curved up in a permanent ‘w’. This made Jihoon blush furiously, as Soonyoung and Wonwoo enthusiastically pointed out. They made him and Jihoon take a picture with one of the stingrays in the large glass tanks. It was his home screen for 7 months. 

Junhui gasped and hugged the plush. “Where did you guys get this?” 

“Target.” Soonyoung held up the bag in his hands. 

“What were you doing at Target at 1AM?” Junhui yawned loudly. 

“Snack break.” Wonwoo held up another bag, stuffed to the brim with chips and and gummies. Junhui nodded in understanding and held out his hand. Wonwoo poured out some sour gummy worms into his hands. 

Junhui turned to Soonyoung and bit off the head of one of the worms. “Speaking of tomorrow, did you get it? You said you would send it by tonight.” 

“Oh!” Soonyoung’s face lit up in realization. He pulled out his phone from his pocket and scrolled through his photos. He sent Junhui a picture and his phone buzzed in response. 

“Thanks,” Junhui looked at the picture. “How did you get this?” 

“I have my ways,” Soonyoung said mysteriously. 

“He stole his wallet.” Wonwoo interjected, popping another gummy worm in his mouth. 

“Wonwoo!” Soonyoung whined. Wonwoo just gave him a shit-eating grin.

“You stole it?” Junhui asked incredulously. “Did he notice?”

“Yeah, and he almost beat my ass for it, so you better be thankful.” Soonyoung grumbled.

Junhui beamed at him. “Thanks, Soonyoung.” 

“I don’t see why you need his locker code. Just give it to him in person.” Soonyoung complained. 

Junhui looked at him with wide eyes. “No way. That’s too much pressure. What if he says no? Then I’ll feel bad, and he’ll feel bad. It’ll be a disaster,” Junhui concluded.

“How would that change with you putting in his locker?” Soonyoung asked incredulously.

“Well, he can just pretend he never saw it, and I can pretend I never gave it to him, and we can just ignore the whole thing. No one feels bad. Problem solved.” Junhui said confidently. 

Wonwoo and Soonyoung just stared at him, mouths agape. “You’re such a dumbass,” Wonwoo said. Junhui glared at him. 

Soonyoung put his hands into the bag and grabbed a handful of gummy worms, shoving them into his mouth. “Yeah well,” he said between chews, “that’s what happens when you’re in love.” 

“I’m not,” Junhui huffed indignantly, “in love.” 

**  
Junhui had never felt his heart beat so fast. Not since the summer golden blonde Jihoon incident. His mouth felt so dry. Was that normal? His legs felt like jelly. Was that normal? Was he dying? This was probably what dying feels like. His hands shook as he turned the dial on Jihoon’s locker. He didn’t even need the picture. He fell asleep yesterday repeating the numbers to himself, and it felt like they were tattooed across his eyelids. He could probably remember the number fifty years from now—if he wasn’t dying right now. 

He managed to get the locker door open despite his shaking hands. He grabbed his bag and pulled out the bouquet of flowers, placing them carefully on top of Jihoon’s books, making sure the sunflowers were pointed outwards towards the door. He pulled out the stingray plush, and placed it gently on top of the bouquet, making sure the smile was visible. Finally, he pulled out the card and stuck it on the locker door with one of the magnets, rearranging it neatly. 

“Junhui?” A melodic voice rang out from the end of the hallway. Junhui’s heart went into overdrive and he was certain now that it had never beat so fast. He peeked his head over the locker door to see Jihoon walking towards him. Jihoon approached him and looked at him quizzically.

“What are you doing? Is that my locker?” Junhui felt his resolve crumble with every question. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. 

“How did you even…get in…” Jihoon faltered and trailed off when he saw his locker, the sunflower and stingray staring back at him. He looked at Junhui, and Junhui couldn’t seem to tear his eyes away, no matter how much he wanted to. “What’s…going on?” He asked softly, looking between him and the occupants of the locker. 

Junhui wasn’t certain that anything that was happening was real. This could be a very vivid dream. Jihoon looked very cute, and smelled very nice, which is pretty indicative of one of Junhui’s dreams. That’s how he is in real life too, a small voice in his head argued. He tried to push the voice down.

This wasn’t real. This couldn’t be real, because he didn’t know what to do if it was. He had to wake up. Now. He closed his eyes and opened them again but he was still there. Jihoon was still there. Everything was still there. Before he could think, his hands moved to the locker door to grab the card. 

He wasn’t in control of his limbs. It felt like his soul had left his body, and now he was just an incorporeal form watching his body move on its own accord. He watched in horror as he handed Jihoon the card. Jihoon took it from him and opened it, glancing briefly at the cover before scanning over the contents of the card. He didn’t say anything, just moved his eyes from line to line and then back again to the beginning. Junhui couldn’t be sure of his vision, but Jihoon’s cheeks seem to be mirroring his own, turning a dusty pink. He read the card over and over again before looking back up at Junhui. 

“Is this a joke?” Jihoon asked quietly, gazing at him. Junhui widened his eyes shook his head fervently. 

“You…like me?” Jihoon said, almost inaudibly. It felt more like a statement of fact than a question, but Junhui nodded frantically. 

Jihoon bit the corner of his lip, flipping the card in his hand. He didn’t say anything, just kept opening and closing the card, still gazing at him. Junhui couldn’t decipher his expression. He was pretty sure Jihoon could hear his heart thundering in his ribcage. 

Jihoon took a deep breath and placed his hands on Junhui’s shoulders, pulling him around. 

Junhui let himself turn to him. 

He tugged on Junhui, pulling him down and pushing himself up. 

Junhui leaned down, and inched forward ever so slightly until they were a breath away.

Jihoon looked different, this close up. His eyes were lighter than he thought, the sun glinting through the hallway to catch a glimmer. There was a small freckle underneath his eyes, as if someone had lightly dotted a pen to his face. He had a faint scar on his nose that he had never noticed before. 

Jihoon bridged the gap between them, softly pressing his lips against Junhui’s and letting his eyes flutter shut. Junhui knew Jihoon could hear the roaring in his chest now. He closed his eyes and let himself be pulled down and placed his hands gently on Jihoon’s shoulders, leaning into the kiss. 

Jihoon flashed across his mind—Jihoon, with the golden sunflower hair and the stingray-like dimples. Jihoon, with the freckle underneath his eyes and the scar on his nose. Jihoon, whose laugh was so melodic it ached his heart. Jihoon, whose presence occupied every chamber of his mind. 

Jihoon, whom he loved.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! i hope you enjoyed!! any thoughts/feedback are appreciated :-)  
> happy early valentines aka carat's birthday!!!  
> come talk to me on [twitter](http://www.twitter.com/jungnoonoo)


End file.
